June 11th, 2010

V sad

Shamed

You know when sometimes you say something you totally didn't think about and then afterwards you forget. But it turns out that what you said really offended someone else, but they didn't let it show and then WAY WAY afterwards they tell you that you said a really offensive thing and although you can't remember, that person isn't the kind who'd lie maliciously, or get the author of the insulting thing mistaken for someone else?

Yeah, that happened to me today. At least I had the chance to apologise. But I still feel like an incredible tool. I can totally understand that person distancing themselves from me. But I'm quite ashamed that I said it. That I need to live with me, the person who said that really insulting thing, is embarrassing. I am embarrassed for and ashamed of myself.

I am SO glad God is gracious. There's no way he'd let a total poo like me into Heaven otherwise.