Kat (etimodnar) wrote,

Thankfulness when it's hard demands prayer

Today has been hard. My ears are ringing and have been on/off ringing for the past week. As in, they'll be ringing for a whole day, then not the next day. It makes my brain a small place to be and noises are so LOUD and everything is so sensitive. And I have not been a nice person to be around. I'm cranky and stressed, upset and angry.

But I have this prayer that's been a bit of a mantra recently. It's helped me feel a little better about me mood, and helped me to resist temptations to lash out in some way. I thought I'd share it for your edification:

Thank you Father for redeeming me. Thank you that I am not a slave to my sin. Thank you that you are sanctifying me to be more like Jesus. Thank you that you are doing this work by the Holy Spirit in me. Thank you that I can be thankful for you love and grace even when I'm feeling crappy. Thank you that I will not always be angry, but that you have made me a citizen of Heaven, wherein I will never be angry again. Thank you that you have already begun this work in me. Thank you for giving me the grace to see improvement. Thank you that fruit is being borne in my life, even though it's little. Thank you for saving me from the punishment my sin currently deserves. Thank you for your love and forgiveness. And even more than that, thank you for transforming me, thank you for doing this work that I cannot do in my strength.

And it fixes my eyes in Jesus. It fixes me on the eternal perspective. It isn't a magic prayer that fixes my problems, but it changes my attitude by 10-50% every time I pray it genuinely. And that fixes my problem, which is my own sinful heart. This whole week has been hard with my ears ringing the way they are, but God has been gracious. I am learning to rejoice always, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for me in Christ Jesus. Mostly I start praying it slowly. I don't want to pray, I don't feel like it, but I start with the obvious truth - that I am not a slave to my sin and emotion because Jesus has set me free. So though I don't feel like it, I thank God for that. And when I start seeking first God's kingdom and his glory, I find that enough grace is given to help me in my need.
Tags: prayer
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